Just saying

Sometimes you just have to play dirty because most of the the time people don’t play fair. Never Hide. Learning is unending, It’s either you will learn or keep on learning. Life is so unfair and will never ever be fair no matter what. God doesn’t tell us what to do, But He provides hint. Don’t push yourself too hard, It will be very difficult for you to achieve what you want. Sometimes it’s not the shape of your heart that matters but how soft or hard it is. Cry. Laugh your heart out. Be strong. Keep your weaknesses to yourself and learn to overcome it. Put a smile on your face, Always. Time wont stop. There’s no turning back. The only way is to look forward. Keep your promises most especially the ones you make for yourself. Never let love become superficial. Tell your stories to no one. Learn from others instead. Change starts within yourself. Don’t ask. Don’t rush. There’s always a perfect time if it’s really meant for you. Always have time for growth and learning. Make mistakes as much as possible but make sure you’ll learn from it. Have 1-2 friends. Lesser friends means lesser stress, lesser vices and lesser complications. Help. It may not be through monetary value but prayers and service will do. Don’t go looking for trouble, but fight if you need to. Love but not more than what you can give yourself. Be selfish but be humble and reachable. Always make some for your self. Isolate yourself if things are too hard to handle. Be angry if you want to. Appreciate critics, They are designed to make you realize things. Never settle to things that are always available. Be choosy but choose wisely, there’s nothing wrong being one. Do things on your freewill. Never give advice. Just listen. Choose mind over heart, later on you’ll be thankful for that. Don’t count your money. It doesn’t make sense.



Look very closely. What do you see? It’s not happiness but agony. Despite the smile, the eyes never lie. The eyes are not looking at you, but looking right through you. Analyzing. Thinking. Wondering. Something familiar? It’s the same old face. Same old pain. Never moving. Never changing. Frozen being same old shit. Same old thing that was left untouched. unnoticed. unbeautiful. Yet still fighting. You know why? because not all things will last left untouched. unnoticed. unbeautiful.

My last goodbye

This is the last time I’ll think of you.

Why? I just don’t know.

Maybe I don’t care anymore.

I don’t know why. Why. Why. Why.

I never though I would feel this way.

Yes I loved you. But that word doesn’t mean anything now.

It doesn’t even matter now.

I’ve been killing myself.

Over and over again.

And I had enough.

Having always to plea for your time

for your attention.

for a bit of love.

This feeling is too much.

This craziness is insane.

I’m losing it.

I’ve been trying everything

but still everyday is like a misery.

but I’ll have to keep on moving anyway.

I should have move on along time ago

I should have let this feeling gone.

I just don’t know why it takes me long enough.

To realize you’re not worth the wait.

The tears.

The time.

The feelings.

And my unhappiness.

I have been caught up with my own emotions.

With my own feelings.

With my own selflessness.

I’ve never felt so low in my life

you’re the only one keep reminding me that.

Now I’m done. So done.

I made mistakes, yes.

Gear up for Kpop


One K Global Peace concert in Manila is less than a month from now but I can already hear the freaking shouts and cheers from the crowd. I can see the colorful light sticks waving, swaying in the air, colorful objects waving together that resembles the stars in the sky. Sparkling and beautiful. We usually call it wave. Different fandoms, different colors. I can also feel the heart beats, the shivering and the unexplained feeling that strikes you whenever you see your bias on stage. And I can ever hear my best friend’s shrieking voice ringing in my ear. Being in a Kpop concert It’s like everything. Well, a lot don’t understand what it feels like being a fan girl but… well..as we always say.. the hell we care.
People call it being crazy, We call it fangirling.
People call it nonsense, We call it fandom.
People would critic, they can say the worst but we don’t give a damn. Honestly. (Seriously)

Some of us are ready, some of us still undecided, some of us may not make it to the concert.

To those ticket holder, here are some tips on how to survive One K Global Concert on the 2nd of March.

1. If you’re a SVIP–standing– ticket holder, the area you’ll be in whether in front or at the back, it will depend on how early you queue before the concert. Some fangirls will queue as early as 8 in the morning. If you plan to queue early make sure you bring food, drinks and some candy in case you’ll get hypoglycemia while in line. And have a friend with you in case you will have to go to the restroom, you can have your friend to queue on your behalf, of course make sure you take turns in going to the restroom so that you can still have your place when you go back. When you plan to go alone during concerts then just die die die… no one will bother to save your place when nature calls.

2. In case you don’t want to bring food with you make sure you have fast food delivery numbers. Some fast food chains do deliver in your area in case you will get hungry.

3. If you’re in a planned sitting area then there’s no need for you to go early as your seat won’t be taken from you since it’s already been saved for you.

4. For those who want to give gifts for their oppas make sure it will be small and light so you can have the chance to throw it on stage. But I don’t encourage it because sometimes it can ruin the performance and sometimes, I mean most of the time you can hit someone with that.
Sometimes organizers put boxes outside where you can put your gifts and letters. But now its seldom that they do that because some gifts are so heavy and big and your bias cannot bring it with them when flying back to korea. Airline Rules. Over baggage and all that.

5. Make sure you have your Fandom light sticks. Whether official or unofficial one will do. Because going to concerts without light sticks is like going to war without a gun. You will feel like you don’t belong. Trust me… Having light sticks is much much much better.

6. Make yourself a banner. Make it more personalize as much as possible. Because it might get the attention of your bias if your banner is a bit different from others. You can use bright colors such as pink, blue or green. If you have extra money you can order LED banner.
Do watch out for your fandom admins also. Most of the time they will give and distribute banners for you to use and keep after the concert. Some fandom will have their fan project using banners. Don’t worry if you don’t know when you will raise it. Usually they will update your fandom page for instructions or others will put the instructions at the back portion of the banners for you to read.

7. Do wear your fandom tee so that people can recognize which fandom you’re in and which group you’re following. Sometimes you can gain instant friends by doing that. And for the record, please refrain from wearing fandom shirt which is not in the line up of artist who will perform. It’s a sign of Respect for others.

8. Pee before the concert starts.

9. Make sure you have enough battery for your cellphones and digicams. Bring power bank if you have one. And if possible do bring an extra memory card in case you will run out of memory. But do not bring DSLR and other high quality cameras as the production and staff wont allow those. Some countries won’t even allow taking photos with your cellphones. But as what I know with Philippine concerts. Yes, they do allow taking photos.

10.Learn your fanchants so that you won’t get lost during concerts. You can learn fanchants on youtube or you can google it.

11. Have a pain killer in your pocket in case you’ll get an upset stomach or headache.

12. Coffee lovers refrain from drinking coffee during queue. It will make you pee often.

The Forty Rules of Love by Elif Shafak

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One day I visited my favorite bookstore when my eyes captured the word “Forty Rules of Love” at that moment I told myself “hey, this is it”. I mean I don’t know about the story nor recognized the author but because of the word LOVE is one thing I’ve been looking for, for quiet sometime.

Continue reading The Forty Rules of Love by Elif Shafak

When the sun sets in Manila Bay

I’ve never been a fan of sunset before. The orange feels that fills the sky is very depressing to look at,  to feel,  to experience.  But apparently one afternoon I found myself admiring the beauty of a setting sun. I look at it like I’ve never laid my eyes to it before. Then suddenly I found myself thinking… Hey… Don’t go! But in the end nothing can stop it from setting.  And that saddened me even more.